


Temporary Bliss

by ghost_in_love



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: M/M, One Shot, POV Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Pre-Canon, Pre-Relationship, Songfic, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch Is Gay for Simon Snow, baz is pinning, pre-watford
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-19
Updated: 2018-07-19
Packaged: 2019-06-13 05:14:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,313
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15357054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ghost_in_love/pseuds/ghost_in_love
Summary: A songfic based on "Temporary Bliss" by The CabThe thoughts of Baz through sixth year to the beginning of eighth year.





	Temporary Bliss

**Author's Note:**

> if you enjoyed, please leave a comment :)  
> thank you for reading!!

Song used:  [ temporary bliss by the cab ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PnugraD0wOQ)

Crossposted on tumblr!

 

**B A Z**

 

_ I come over _

_ Quarter past two _

 

It was nearly two am, Snow would surely be asleep by now. I hadn’t seen him all summer. I missed staring at Snow. I did see him running after Wellbelove, but I couldn’t be bothered to shout out a snarky remark. Summer was exhausting, especially because he still thinks I’m going through a phase. I just wanted to curl up in bed. But no, I’m coming out of the catacombs.

I snuck into our room ( _ our _ room), and rolled into my sheets. A deep breath in, and I turned over to look at my roommate. 

 

_ Love in my eyes _

_ Blinded by you _

_ Just to get a taste of heaven _

_ I'm on my knees _

 

The moon’s beams added a pale glow to his tawny freckled skin. Snow always made all these sounds when he slept. Mostly growls or the occasional whine, but they were always accompanied by tossing and turning. It always pained me; I knew he was suffering, yet I only added to his misery. What else was I supposed to do? Truly, was I just supposed to walk up to him and apologize after years of antagonizing? Of course not.

 

_ I can't help it _

_ I'm addicted _

 

Instead, I’m here. Sheltered by the moonlight and the dark wind. Sheltered by unachievable hopes and dreams. It was enough for me, I could stare at Snow forever in the comfort of the darkness.

_ But I can't stand the _

_ Pain inflicted _

_ In the morning _

_ You're not holding on to me _

 

Evidently, there was always two fears that kept me up at night. The realization that I would be killed by Snow’s hand, and that after this year I would no longer stare upon his beautiful face. It especially hurt each morning. Like the idiot he is, he just changed right out in the open. His muscles flexing over his head, his raspy voice telling me to fuck off. Sometimes, it was too much.  ~~ It was always too much. ~~

 

_ Tell me what's the point of doin' this every night _

_ What you're givin' me _

_ Is nothin' but a heartless lullaby _

 

Other nights, I imagine him holding me tightly as we both drift to sleep. My head tucked under his chin even though I’m taller, but he knows I like to be coddled sometimes. His arms wrapped securely around my waist, maybe one had threading through my hair. Or maybe our fingers would interlock, and we’d fall asleep at night.

 

_ Gonna kill my dreams, oh _

_ This is the last time _

_ Baby make up your mind _

 

I never get any rest, he even plagues my dreams. Stupid, beautiful Snow. It’s worth it though. That’s the only time I can be with him and not fight.

 

_ 'Cause I can't keep sleepin' in your bed _

_ If you keep messin' with my head _

_ Before I slip under your sheets _

 

It was halfway through the school term. I abhorred Snow again. Just like our first meeting when the Crucible set us up. Each time he got back together with Wellbelove, it made me even angrier. Of course he had to flaunt his straightness. His perfect girl, whom would always be there with him. The golden girl and the Chosen One.  

 

_ Can you give me somethin' please? _

_ I can't keep touchin' you like this _

_ If it's just temporary bliss _

_ Just temporary bliss _

 

Even so, Wellbelove never saw him like I did. I saw him at his most vulnerable. Snow’s eyelashes were long and fluttered against his cheeks when he slept (even when he was awake, too). 

 

_ We were on fire _

_ Now we're frozen _

 

I could never hate Snow.

 

_ There's no desire _

_ Nothing spoken _

_ You're just playin' _

_ I keep waitin' for your heart _

_ (I keep waitin' for ya') _

 

He would never see me as more as his arch enemy. I took what I could get. Just seeing him there, was enough.

 

_ I am fiendin' for the sunshine _

_ To show our love in a good light _

_ Give me reason _

_ I am pleadin' to the stars _

_ (Tell me) _

 

As our seventh year went on, my fantasizes had become more prominent. More needy. I couldn’t bare to look him in the eye. Pathetic.

 

_ Tell me what's the point of doin' this every night _

_ What you're givin' me _

_ Is nothin' but a heartless lullaby _

_ Gonna kill my , oh _

_ This is the last time _

_ Baby make up your mind _

 

I stared down at Wellbelove under my lashes. We were here, in the Wavering Wood. Her hands clasped in mine, her face lit with a soft blush. I heard Snow even before he was screaming at me. I turned to give him a sneer and to bring his girl closer to me, and then before I could blink, he and that Bunce girl vanished.

I dropped Wellbelove’s hands immediately and stalked off.

I scowled, but I was terrified. My Simon Snow, where had you gone? That was our last day of the school term, too. Fiona picked me up a few hours later and I sulked in the back seat.

 

_ 'Cause I can't keep sleepin' in your bed _

_ If you keep messin' with my head _

_ Before I slip under your sheets _

_ Can you give me somethin' please? _

_ I can't keep touchin' you like this _

_ If it's just temporary bliss _

_ Just temporary bliss _

 

Summer came and went, and I was to return to my final year of Watford. Snow plagued my thoughts more than normal, especially after he disappeared like that. Was he alright? Was--fuck.

 

_ I'm your one and only, only when you're lonely _

_ (Na-na-na-na na-na-na-na) [x2] _

 

I can’t believe I’m being kidnapped. By fucking numpties. Fuck me. And they have the audacity to put me in a  _ coffin? _ The Nerve. I’m going to die here. 

 

_ I'm your one and only, only when you're lonely _

_ Baby why you callin' me? _

_ Not another one night _

_ Try'na be your whole life _

_ I don't wanna fall asleep _

 

The days turned to weeks, the weeks into months. No Snow (besides the one in my mind), no food, no sanity, no nothing. Except, of course, darkness and the blood every couple of days. 

Then I heard shouting. Screams. Explosions. Someone lifted the lid to my dear coffin. Fiona.

 

_ I'm your one and only, only when you're lonely _

_ Baby why you callin' me? _

_ Not another one night _

_ Try'na be your whole life _

 

“Oh no you don’t. Front seat’s for people who haven’t been kidnapped by fucking numpties. Get in the back. We’re going home,” Fiona smirked.

“I have to go to school,” I muttered weakly.

“No, we’re going to let you heal.” That was final.

 

_ I can't keep sleepin' in your bed _

_ If you keep messin' with my head _

_ Before I slip under your sheets _

_ Can you give me somethin' please? _

_ I can't keeping touchin' you like this _

_ If it's just temporary bliss _

_ Just temporary bliss _

_ Temporary bliss _

 

Of course, I fought tooth and nail. Even threatened to run away to get there (if I had to). 

It worked. I was back. “ **Open Sesame!** ” I commanded, waltzing into the mess hall. I heard a chair clatter, Snow sputtering at me. (My idiot.) I saw Wellbelove look at me with hopeful eyes, but I paid them no mind.

“Good Evening, gents,” I said to Dev and Niall. 

 

_ I can't keep sleepin' in your bed _

_ If you keep messin' with my head _

_ I can't keep feelin' love like this _

 

I was back in my own bed. Back in our room. Finally. Snow was tossing and turning more than usual, and I guessed it had to do with what happened before summer. The moon was at it again, painting her beams on Snow’s curly cinnamon hair. I sighed in contempt. 

Even so, it was torture. Snow would off me, just like he would to the Insidious Humdrum.

 

_ It's not worth temporary bliss _


End file.
